Look at the picture above.
How many of us are doing such stunt? Twirling and balancing plate or a few plates on each pole?
I am such person.
I have different roles.
I am a daughter, a sister, a mum & a wife.
I am also a friend, a co-worker, a subordinate, an acquaintance.
There are expectations and requirements for each roles.
There are definitely a few poles for each roles.
There are of course different attitude to be portrayed for each roles.
I try my utmost best to keep the plates spinning in a balancing manner.
I try my utmost best to prevent the plates from slipping and crashing onto the floor by dashing to the ones that seems to be twirling slower and are wobbling.
I try my utmost best to twirl the pole with care lest too strong a twitch by my wrist sends every thing crashing down.
But alas... I am just a human.
There is only so much things that I can do for every one.
There is only so much burdens that I can carry on my shoulder.
There is only so much emotions that I can hold in my hands, be sensitive with it and treat it with tender loving care.
What happens when I have the dreaded feelings that enough is enough?
What happens when I slipped and behave out of the normalcy?
What happens when I simply feels tired and just want to give up?
What happens then?
"Just be YOU for those who matter"?
What if every one matters to me?
Because you will not be part of my life if you do not mean anything to me.
Do I allow myself to raise the white flag?
No.
Because I have -high- expectations and requirements for myself.
I am like wading in mucking water
not sinking
not drowning
but surviving
Alas... I am but a Human...
A listening ear
A knowing heart
A comforting word
A reassuring voice
A consoling hug
A silly laughter
is all I need.